Sunday, January 2, 2011

As we await news, it is hard to stay calm. This war is becoming more and more unpopular here in America. For good reason: it is obscenely expensive during a very bad economy. And, it is clear that many Afghani's don't know why we're there in the first place. It is a long hardship to bear, morally, economically, and emotionally.
Tragic. We wait for news. Where will we be in a year? Where will my husband be in a couple months? No answers.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Boxing Day, Soldiers

Today is the day after Christmas. I was reading a blog by a well known author, I won't mention here, yesterday. She had asked for prayers for many people in need. Many people responded to her request to hold in heart whatever group of people she had mentioned. She mentioned homeless, sick, etc. Then she mentioned praying for the families of those soldiers killed overseas, whose bodies were returning. The response of people was really interesting and significant I believe.
A few people were vehemently furious that she asked anyone to pray for what they labelled as "killers." Others agreed they were "killers" but asked for prayers for everyone involved in such tragedy as is war. There was the token soldier-on-a-pedestal sound byte too (which is offensive in its own way). The author went on to try to explain how complicated war was, that yes there are bad apples and we should pray for all those touched by suffering, but that most soldiers are there trying to building roads, schools, offer security, etc. That their families need our compassion as do many people, and that there lives contained acts of integrity and character.

Myself, with a foot in both camps, if they are separate camps: that is the peace movement and our soldiers: is constantly challenged to stretch my heart. How plainly I see their mutual goals.
The author's parents had been touched by war in Eastern Europe, as were her grandparents, and she knew the cost of not being protected and left vulnerable to bad actors and zealous mobs.

It seems to me our collective inability to speak about war in America, without reactivity and sound byte responses, will leave us vulnerable to the very thing we fear to think and therefore speak clearly about. War, spoken of in all its suffering and practicality reveals its very limited usefulness and moral confusion. We can not speak of war clearly if all soldiers are deemed killers and war is in every circumstance labelled evil. We can not speak of war clearly if we put our soldiers up on pedestals (sometimes with their families) thereby robbing them of their voice and demanding the price of hero worship: voiceless sacrifice in bearing the weight of all the suffering in these wars. Yes, the economy is in dire straights, but that it isn't a shared sacrifice to the full extent...only a fraction of the cost of these wars. We are buying them on credit and passing the bill to our kids.

This blaming and worshipping of soldiers just seems a distraction for the real issues at hand in this war. I can not think of an army family that I know that does not pray for peace and want their beloved one home. I can not think of a soldier that I know that is not doing his, or her, best. Yes, there are bad apples. I'm grateful that I don't know any personally. Yes, people under impossible duress "lose it" at times. War is rife with utter tragedy. In itself, it is tragedy: the utter breakdown of any possible negotiations and communication. It brings so much suffering. But it won't end.
It won't end unless Americans had to actually share the moral and economic sacrifice that war demands. It won't end unless people can actually think out things deeply and discuss these issues. If we did, then certainly, people would demand peace from their leaders and bring our loved ones home.

Friday, December 10, 2010

First Post

I don't know why nobody talks about the war, but I have some guesses. The reasons are different whether you are a civilian or in the military. I'm both, being that I'm an army wife. I'm also a peace activist, if one can be both, and thus is my blog.
I started this blog on the 30th anniversary of John Lennon's death. Our family and our little world here is preparing for Christmas. I can not hear "So this is Christmas" without crying. I can't belive the wars have gone on so long.
And now my husband's unit may be deploying again very soon. It was only a year ago that we got him back form Afghanistan. I thought we would be getting out of the military - I did hope to, as we've been at this about ten years. We have young children and though my husband is doing well at his career, I had hoped we would get out and make a different life for ourselves.
Its not the moving or his time away with various trainings that is so hard. It is this: the father of my children in danger for a war that is more and more forgotton, not what the people of America semingly want, and seemingly may not be what the people of Afghanistan want ... though I'm not sure what the latest polls say. I do know that most of them don't know why we're there. And then there's the whole sad business of war. I don't belive in the glory of war, only that it is always a last resort (or should be) and always tragic. Yes, I do think at times it, or some form of international policing, may be necessary. There are many bad actors out there. It causes so much sufferring. Does anyone read Just War Theory anymore?
I'm not sure many americans know either why we're there. I question it myself.
I want to help the people, not be involved in supporting warlords or oppressing the very people we were sent in to liberate.
And all the billions of billions of dollars we are pouring into the "graveyard of empires." It earned that name for a reason. Couldn't that money be used at home? Look at our country ... how can we make these cuts to our social programs annd waste trillions in Afghansitan. There is good being done, that I know first hand, but there is also so much waste. Unfortunately I also know that.

What does one do? People don't talk about the war. Its not a fun topic and people seem to like positive, entertaining subjects. No one wants to talk about the war and no one wants to discuss sacrifice for it. Why don't the politicians publicly connect the dots?

Its so sad that civilian people won't discuss it. Army wives, not many of us do discuss it. For one, we may not be able to talk much about our husbands for security purposes. And we usually have a housefull of kids to get through it all. One can't fall apart if we need to help little Johnny or Susie grow healthy, feel secure, and be nurtured. And then, it seems, an ever present unspoken heaviness.